Saturday, September 22, 2012

More About This Little Thing Called Love...

First off, I would just like to announce that I am ready to have a camera once more... not the camera on my phone, but a camera... a real life camera. Perhaps the Insurance Adjustor reads this blog and will consider this as she works away on my list of things that were stolen. Yes, perhaps, she does...

Secondly, The Red Barn Outdoor Market Fall Edition was more wonderful than I can even write about. You can see photos here. The Vendors, the Musicians, and the food were so amazing and the part that I love most is getting to see the community built between people. It makes me happy in so many ways.

But, neither of these are actually the subjects of this post... no, because of the first (no camera), I'm having to actually write and share and be human. I prefer to post pictures, be a little standoff-ish and be more of a computer robot... just warming up before I get really honest.

I've been patient and kind... I have of course, been humble and refined in every word and deed... okay, so there are still a few kinks here and there... I'm moving on even so.

"It does not insist on its own way;
it is not irritable or resentful;"

Well, this one just really stinks. I actually always prefer my own way; the grace and mercy that must be showered upon me to put this one into practice is unbelievable. I like doing things my own way. I want others to like doing things my way. And even if I do end up doing something someone else's way, I am surely not going to be happy about it. So, this one's going to be hard...

Why do I insist on my way? Because it puts me in control. I like being in control. Having to let loose of control means that I have to place trust in someone or something else. Oooh, and there it is... I have to trust. I have to place dependence on something other than myself. Ouch, that actually physically stung just a little bit  because I have some major trust issues. MAJOR, people. 

I obviously know that trust and love go hand in hand... like in a marriage... but I've never really placed the two together in other relationships. Like by trusting someone, by placing my dependence on them, is actually loving them... and allowing them to love me. And that's big.

Wow... well, I don't know how I ended up here and I'm not really sure that this will even make sense to anyone else on earth, but it has me thinking.

Also, as I was writing this, I found one of my favorite necklaces that I thought had been stolen. It was hiding in a jar on my desk... thank you to the Little Love who probably had something to do with this!!!!

Have a lovely, wonderful weekend! Mine will be filled with local Fall Markets, Potato Soup and the theatre!!

1 comment:

  1. from one trust issues girl to another, i enjoyed your post & "get it." i can count on one hand how many people i truly trust, i've had far too many "friends" stab me in the back. i am naturally a person that loves to help anyone & easily forgives-- but never, ever forgets. so as for letting people genuinely into my life, seldom am i willing to do so. but the lord does wonderful work within when you ask him (acutally... i don't remember asking...ha), he's chipping away at me currently!