Whirlwinds and Stretching.

The last couple of months have been a whirlwind.
The Red Barn Outdoor Market grew by almost three times what it was last Spring and it took so much more to organize and keep things rolling smoothly. It happened though; it was muddy and cold, but it did happen and we did have a blast!

Seeing the pictures reminds me how much I love this opportunity. I just love it SO much and am so thankful for it.

Once the market stuff ended, we began focusing attention to getting our house listed on the market. We're STILL working on that. We're hoping to find a space that accommodates all of our needs... one of those needs being space for another family member! We'll be welcoming another little baby to our lives mid-November. 

This pregnancy has definitely made itself a priority in my daily life most days as I have been extremely nauseous and exhausted. I finally started feeling less exhausted and haven't been too nauseous at all since about last Thursday. I do still have three other children, though, and they also make themselves a priority in my daily life. The last few weeks have just been trying and exhausting all around.

And today it all came forth. Everything that I've been pushing off, holding back, just trying to survive the days, all came to a sobbing mess today. I am not one that cries too often, especially not when overwhelmed... until it just gets to that point when I am REALLY overwhelmed. I was sobbing and telling the girls over and over that I just could not handle it anymore... and my five year laughed at me. Hmm... wonder where she picked that up from? Mother, I do not regret ever laughing at you when you were crying over some of the silly things you cried over, however, I was in your shoes today. So know that payback is taking place. I honestly think that she just had no idea what to do, so she laughed. It's okay, it gave me an opportunity to question what on earth was going on.

I had no answer, but I knew that SOMETHING had to be going on besides just being exhausted and sick and tired of the daily motherly opportunities I've been given.

And then I lost it again tonight. My heart was just heavy... and then I realized that it's heavy from the grief that this week bears.

May 16th, tomorrow, will be the 9th anniversary of my Mother-in-law's and youngest brother-in-law's deaths. The day, the moments, the phone calls are still very clear in my mind. May 16th, 2004 changed the direction of our lives in so many, many ways... 

May 17th, 2006 brought more heartache as I experienced the physical and emotional loss of our first baby through miscarriage. It never gets to me until this week... every year.

And my heart gets heavy. I don't get it. I am thankful for it... as it's always a perfect reminder of the sovereign grace that is so generously given out when most needed. And it makes me feel something that is not a normal part of my everyday life. And it makes me long for Home, in different ways than exhaustion and toddlers throwing tantrums make me long for Home. 

There's just a lot of "stretching" taking place around these parts tonight and my whole being feels it.

Adding to the stretching, two of Jacob's brothers are moving away in the next week or so; one is taking his pregnant wife with him as well! I struggle to write the words that would give some sort of explanation as to how my heart feels about this. It makes me so sad. Life certainly doesn't afford me the time that I used to be able to spend with them, so the times that I do have with them are really meaningful to me, even when it's just dinner or them just stopping by. I feel like the little widow we visit down the street just longing for a little more time each time. Being married to their older brother and not having my mother-in-law around these last several years has given me such incredible opportunities to love them in a lot of different ways and I do love them so much.

So, we'll see what the rest of this night holds in store... certainly not finishing off the bag of Black Forest Caramels I have... actually it may in fact be those little caramels time to shine. Though a glass of pineapple juice also sounds really delicious... we'll see who shines brighter.

This Makes Me Laugh...

... EVERY time I see it. I almost fell out of my chair just now because this cracks me up so much.

It's a picture from our past that I found as I was browsing through old photos of my babies (when my niece turned five, I may or may not have had an emotional meltdown as I looked through a little book of pictures that I had of her through the years... you can imagine my emotional state looking through pictures of my own little tinies! And there's no need to ask my husband about the emotional meltdown I had about my niece... it didn't startle him in the least or make him question why he chose to spend his life with a girl).

Hoping this day brings a lot of laughter into your life... or at least a few hearty chuckles here and there.

Signs Of Spring.

We found a Rabbit Hole in our backyard full of babies and they are SO cute.

Ladybugs are landing on us.

And Mr. Toad has been found. Lucy really took a liking to him and had him drive her around in the car, go for a stroller ride, and I'm sure his favorite... take a ride in the carriage on her bike. She is safety conscious and was sure he was in a seat belt. She cracks me up. Isn't the top picture of the toad hilarious? I can't look at it and not chuckle.

I have a 5k today and a picture session tomorrow. The 5k is a beautiful, beautiful run and I love it. That's about the distance of my usual route when actually consistently running, but it's been a tad bit chilly around these parts and I've ran less than 5 times this last Winter... let's hope I make it!

Have a lovely weekend!

On The Menu: Roasted Chicken Cherry Nachos

Roasted Chicken Cherry Nachos (1-2 servings)
3-4 oz of Roasted Chicken*
1/4 cup of Dried Cherries
2 Tablespoons of Slivered Almonds
1/4 cup of fresh Spinach
12-15 Multigrain Tortilla Chips

Lay the tortilla chips around a small plate. Place warm roasted chicken over the chips; add Spinach; top with cherries and almonds.

*I purchased a whole chicken and roasted it one afternoon, having a meal for that evening and then saving the rest to use throughout the week. This has proven to be such a help through the week that I will more than likely be adding this to my weekly routine.


I've been trying to eat Dairy-free and Wheat-free since the beginning of February in hopes that I can figure out some things and get systems working correctly once more. Neither have been really hard to let go most days; some days I tear through the house throwing everything in sight just wanting to eat something without looking at the label or questioning the server about the ingredients.

I would say that a good 95% of my diet had some form of cheese or butter in it.

Um... I love, LOVE bread and butter. My little Grandma loves bread and butter. One of my little ladies could live on bread and butter. So, see I'm fighting my genes here!!

I've also been reading the book, "French Women Don't Get Fat" and before you stick your nose in the air at the French, it really has been a very eye-opening read for me. It's written by a woman who is French but lives in America. The book really just points to the fact that French women don't diet and they eat the things that they really want to eat. They do it in small portions; they skip the bread if they want the dessert, little choices like these allow them to eat pleasurably.

One of my favorite parts of the book was where she was speaking of how in the late eighteenth century a new code was fashioned in France, les arts de la table:
"The table became a spectacle. Standard dishes received their classical names, and there followed a rush of innovation, imitation, and, indeed fashion. Few Americans, even Michelin-guided gastrotourists, really appreciate the extent to which our cooking is like our couture."

I related to this very much as I feel that the cooking of and presentation of the meals I prepare are just another creative outlet for me. I'm looking forward to finishing this soon, but have already begun implementing a few ideas that I've taken away so far.

So, having new ideas and some new limitations, I've had the opportunity to introduce some new tastes to my palette and be creative pairing different ingredients together. These Nachos were definitely a huge hit for my taste buds! Please enjoy!

"I Made That!" Monday: Vintage Inspired Girls Dress

With Spring coming and two little ladies who prefer dresses to anything else, I was excited to find several different fabrics that have a very vintage look to them. They were also super inexpensive, so I may have gone a bit crazy. I'm okay with that though.

Have a lovely day!